One Year On

One year ago, on the 28th February 2011 I started my new job at Curtin University as an eLearning advisor. After 25 years at AUT University it was bound to be an interesting experience.

After the excitement of meeting new team members (wonderful people who have supported me through a rough year!) and seeing the great facilities and exciting projects that they were doing had settled down, I first had feelings of fear.

Fear that I was not good enough, that I had made a mistake wanting this job and that they had made a mistake in hiring me. It was like the line in “The Shawshank Redemption” about being institutionalised, perhaps I had stayed too long at AUT and was unable to adapt to a new University, new systems and a new country.

But quickly I felt good about how I learned my role and I felt that I did have great contributions to make to eLearning at Curtin and in Australia. Then the shit came down!

When my professional life was going so well, perhaps I had neglected some of my private life? There were many contributing factors, our house did not sell quickly and the time for my family arriving over here got longer. Then I got a phone call from my ex-wife saying she wanted a separation. No discussion from my part, no counselling or attempts at reconciliation, just one door closing on me.

I am sure I must have contributed to the breakdown, but I was pretty oblivious to it. Either I am not as sensitive as I thought I was or I must be a bastard. Perhaps the truth lies somewhere in between. I entered a dark part of the last year and could only focus on the failure. I was not productive at work, and thanks to the support and leadership shown by my colleagues, managers and friends I managed to got through it.

But I survived, I came out the other side and am reborn again in a new year! Things are looking up for me now, I am feeling more positive about my life and the future. So here’s to tomorrow, who know what it might bring, but it will be an adventure!